Halloween Anthology

Here's a beautiful poem called 'Halloween' to get you in the mood for this upcoming holiday season... Bonfires burning bright. Pumpkin faces in the night. I remember Halloween. Dead cats hanging from poles. Little dead are out in droves. I remember Halloween. If this beautiful limerick from the great Glenn Danzig doesn't do it for you, maybe a full detailed analysis of the Halloween anthology will.

Halloween

(1978) [Trailer]

Director: John Carpenter [IMDB]

Synopsis: A psycho killer escapes from the mental ward and goes on a killing spree.

I consider this one of the greatest horror films of all time and it's absolutely the best slasher film ever made. From that very first long extended shot of Micheal going through the house and killing his sister... I instantly fell in love with this movie. I really dig how Carpenter keeps injecting Michael into the background and letting the viewer know that he's always stalking his prey. The score is a masterpiece and untouched by any other horror film. For it's genre and time, it is perfection for me. Get on it.

Halloween II

(1981) [Trailer]

Director: Rick Rosenthal [IMDB]

Synopsis: Picking up moments after the ending of part 1... Michael returns to kill again.

Rick Rosenthal takes the directing reins, but Carpenter is still involved as a writer, so for me part two feels similar to it's predecessor. However, it's not nearly as good in my opinion. It's tends to drag it's feet a little towards the end and I started to lose interest. I'm not saying this is a bad film, it's not, it's just hard to recreate the glory of the first installment.

It was nice to see the kid from The Last Starfighter in this and also the return of Donald Pleasence and Jamie Lee Curtis.

Halloween III: Season of the Witch
(1982) [Trailer]
Director: Tommy Lee Wallace [IMDB]

Synopsis: Michael is back and ready for... wait... no he's not.

You read that right, there's no Michael Myers in this chapter and honestly I couldn't give a shit. I have 5 other movies starring that fucker that I have to watch, so it's a nice change of pace for me. Basically this film feels like an extended episode of the Twilight Zone but with a little more gore. It also reminded me a lot of They Live and Invasion of the Body Snatchers. I really enjoyed this much more than I thought I would. The concept is a bit involved and the execution of it isn't 100%, but it's still solid film. Highlights for me were: 1. The overly catchy shamrock song I will probably be singing tomorrow. 2. The Doctor and girl's hook up that starts with the line "Where would you like to sleep, Dr. Challis?" 3. The score. 4. The creepy old lady knitting. 5. The kid being murdered... that's always fun.

Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers
(1988) [Trailer]
Director: Dwight H. Little [IMDB]

Synopsis: Michaels back alright...

This film pays heavy homage to the first chapter. It hits on everything that makes these movies click and does a decent job at it. It's not miraculous but it's pretty entertaining. Acting wise it's alright, there are some spotty moments here and there. Donald Pleasence is back and this time there's a little girl that eats up most of the screen time, she's okay I guess... you may recognize her from Adventures in Babysitting.   The Return of Michaels Myers best moments come towards the last 20 minutes and the ending of the film is really solid.

Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers
(1989) [Trailer]
Director: Dominique Othenin-Girard (IMDB)

Synopsis: Do I really need to add a synopsis at this point... I don't think so.

If part 4's intent was to emulate part 1, part 5's intent is to emulate part 4... basically it's the same soup warmed over... and definitely not as good. Judging from the close proximity of the release dates, it seems like this installment was cranked out to ride on the success of part 4. Revenge stars the same little girl, Donald Pleasence, and the main older teen from part 4. The weird thing is the older teenage girl is killed in the first 15 minutes and after she's killed it seems like no one even cares where she is or if she's ok... especially considering the circumstances. It seems pretty useless to me to bring that character back. Also there are these two cops who are partners and the director tries to give them this hokey slap stick vibe which didn't work for me... even going as far as to put these weird sound effects in, which were ridiculous. The last thing is the ending, it was bad... I won't spoil it but there's this unseen man with steel toed boots that's completely unexplained and pointless.

Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers

(1995) [Trailer]

Director: Joe Chappelle [IMDB]

Synopsis: Refer to part 4.

This movie is a mess. Tonally 'The Curse of Michael Myers' is completely unlike the others so far and you immediately know that it was made in the 90's. I knew instantly that I was going to hate this film when the narration started in the beginning... you have this guy lazily giving you back story that really doesn't help support the film itself. I felt like most of this movie didn't really add up to anything cohesive. There's zero character development, so everyone that you're introduced to you could give a shit about when Michael is hacking them up. The addition of the druids and their back story didn't add much to this film as well.

One other glaring problem is... this is 6 years after the last movie, which would mean that Michael's niece (the little girl from the last two movies) is 15 years old and pregnant... there's no way the girl cast in this film is anywhere near 15.

Halloween H20: 20 Years Later
(1998) [Trailer]
Director: Steve Miner [IMDB]

Synopsis: Jamie Lee Curtis is back along with director Steve Miner from the Friday the 13th franchise.

This film moves back towards the original tone of the first two. There's a pretty long stretch with no activity in the middle of H20, and by no activity I mean... Michael chopping up people. You actually have a surprising cast of people who went on to bigger and better things... Josh Hartnett, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Michelle Williams... oh yeah and L...L... Cool J? This installment focuses on Jamie Lee Curtis getting over her fear of Michael and confronting him head on. H20 is ok I guess and not as bad as I had heard.

One thing real quick... Michael steals a car in Illinois and drives it all the way to California.... how's he getting gas?

Halloween: Resurrection
(2002) [Trailer]
Director: Rick Rosenthal [IMDB]

Synopsis: Michael terrorizes a group of reality TV stars who invade his former home.

This movie is a turd. It's chopped full of product placement to the point where it bothered me, which it normally doesn't. It's a pretty weak story and delivered by a bunch of shit actors including Busta Rhymes. I'll be honest... I fell asleep halfway through this and I seriously have no desire to go back and see how it ended.

  

Cinderella

Cinderella
(1950) [Trailer]
Directors: Clyde Geronimi [IMDB], Wilfred Jackson [IMDB], Hamilton Luske [IMDB]

Synopsis: Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who's the... sorry... wrong movie.

I'm pretty sure everyone in the world has seen this film, well not everyone, but a shit ton of people have. You know what though, not everyone has seen it on Disney blu-ray (because it just came out this week) and I can tell you it looks like a whole new movie. Cinderella was an effective pacifier in the salad days of my young childhood and looking at it now brings back fond memories. My parents probably thought I was a little jerk and one of the most effective ways to shut up a little jerk... sit him in front of a Disney cartoon and let him zone the hell out. I don't think I need to explore the deeper meanings of this film, or why Disney's main character always come from single parent homes... that's right... think about it. Anyways, this is a good time... bibbidi-bobbidi-boo-boo bitches!

Seven Psychopaths

Seven Psychopaths
(2012) [Trailer]
Director: Martin McDonagh [IMDB]

This is the newest installment from the guy that brought you In Bruges, which I thought was a good film. His resume, besides that, is rather short so I was a bit hesitant going into this, especially considering some of the reviews out there for it.

Synopsis: Sam Rockwell and Christopher Walken are dog kidnappers, when they steal the dog of a mob boss (Woody Harrelson), things start to go to Shih.... Tzu. See what I did there?

This film's greatest strengths lays in it's characters and dialog. Most are pretty memorable and extremely hilarious. Sam Rockwell stole the show for me, he was awesome. Walken, Waits, Harrelson, and Farrell are all strong too and help usher in the laughs. It was rad to also see a little cameo from Harry Dean Stanton as the Quaker psycho... Harry Dean Stanton rules. Seven Psychopaths is also pretty violent and serves up a ton of gore... which I loved. So people who have problems watching heads get hacked off with pipe saws... be warned!

Some of the things that annoyed me were all the meta references to itself and the process of writing the film as things unfold, it was ok at first but started to drag on after awhile. I felt like all the stuff with the Vietnamese psycho could have been just cut from the film all together, although I did enjoy Christopher Walken's resolution to that whole part of the story at the end of the film.

I don't know... there's actually not a ton to dislike here for me personally. I really enjoyed this a lot and found it highly entertaining. I will probably pick it up on blu-ray and give it a rewatch by end of year.

Snow White and the Huntsman

Snow White and the Huntsman
(2012) [Trailer]
Director: Rupert Sanders [IMDB]

I can imagine at the pitch meeting for this film the producer being like "Ok... forget about the Snow White you think you know, this is a whole new Snow White for a new generation." or some shit like that.

Synopsis: An evil queen tracks down a princess who will give her ever lasting youth.

I wasn't a big fan of this film and there are a lot of things that annoyed me about the story. One main thing is why they decided to introduce the Prince and Thor as Snow White's potential love interests. It didn't seem necessary, just pick one of them and focus on that. It just inflated an overly long movie. There were a few other plot holes and things that didn't work, but whatever. The special effects were pretty good, except for one swamp monster thingy. There was also some really impressive cinematography, but not enough to give this a passing grade from me.

The People vs. George Lucas

The People vs. George Lucas
(2010) [Trailer]
Director: Alexandre O. Philippe [IMDB]

I love The Empire Strikes Back, it's probably one of my favorite sci-fi films of all time... no, actually it is. I would consider myself a pretty huge Star Wars fan as well... well at least a fan of the original three. After watching this, I realized something: I'm not as big of a fan as I thought. 

Synopsis: Star Wars fanboys talk about why they are so upset with George Lucas.

Jesus guys... Star Wars is just a movie... calm down. I get being disappointed in the prequels and even being annoyed with all of the tinkering Lucas did with the original trilogy, but it's not really that big of a deal. I guess I don't get all the angst behind this film... these people that claimed Lucas raped their childhood are a little over the top. The originals can still be watched (even the untinkered versions) and aren't going anywhere... your childhood is fine. I guess this film will connect more with the Star Wars Fanboys, but for me it was kind of boring and really one sided.

The Shining

The Shining
(1980) [Trailer]
Director: Stanley Kubrick [IMDB]

I'm sure you've probably seen this film, but if you haven't... seriously what the fuck is wrong with you?

Synopsis: A man and his family are hired to take care of a remote hotel that's closed during the winter... nothing bad happens at all.

This is one of the greatest horror films ever made in my book and every time I watch it I catch more things that just add to it's creep factor. The visuals in this film are insane and it has some of the greatest cinematography out there. The use of the large and confusing hotel set against a massive garden maze gives the viewer a sense of unease throughout the whole movie. Jack Nicholson is about as good as it gets, he goes from questionable to asshole to psycho flawlessly.

There's a ton of unsettling moments during The Shining's run time... here are my top five:

1. The river of blood, obviously amazing.
2. The man in the bear suit giving the other man a bj. I have no idea how it fits into the story but it's scary.
3. The use of mirrors with the best moment coming from the mirrors inside room 237... the lead up to the front door of the room is so suspenseful.
4. The nude young/old woman.
5. The gold room's bathroom scene with Jack and the former care taker... that whole scene is eerie as hell.

This is a must watch for the halloween season... there aren't many films I actually consider scary... this is definitely one of them.

Universal's Classic Monsters Marathon - Dracula, Frankenstein, Bride of Frankenstein, The Wolf Man, The Mummy, The Invisible Man, Phantom of the Opera, and Creature from the Black Lagoon

Last week Universal Pictures laid the smack down on horror fans across the country by releasing a slew of classic monster films on blu-ray in one beautiful box set. I've had this set in my wish list since June when it was officially announced and have been eagerly awaiting its release. Now that the Halloween season is upon us I figured, what better time to sit down and bang these out.

Dracula
(1931) [Trailer]
Director: Tod Browning [IMDB]

Synopsis: There is this guy Dracula, you may have heard of him, he's kind of a big deal.

This is the movie that started it all... well not really, but it's probably the most famous of the Vampire movies... until Twilight came a long. Like all of these movies you have to take into account the time in which they were released, obviously compared to today's standards of horror this is a bit tame. Bela Lugosi is pretty creepy and sums up what I think of when I imagine Dracula in my mind. I love the set pieces and matte painting used throughout this, especially during the ride into Dracula's castle. The acting is a bit over dramatic, but again, that's a sign of the times. I really enjoyed Dracula a lot, it has this quietness about it that makes it feel uncomfortable and maybe that's why it still works for me as a scary movie.

Frankenstein
(1931) [Trailer]
Director: James Whale [IMDB]

Synopsis: A scientist creates a man out of dead people. Everything goes completely fine.

I dug this film a lot and it was interesting to fully sit down and watch it all the way through. The make up of Frankenstein is superb and still looks really good for it's age. As with Dracula, there's a lot of great set designs, I especially loved the windmill scene towards the end. The scene with the man walking his dead daughter to town was extremely powerful and pretty ballsy for the time. It's funny because as much of a monster as Frankenstein was, it's also a story about how man can also become a monster. Dr Frankenstein basically creates this beast then barely does anything to help him along, then his assistant comes in a tries to burn and whip him... no wonder he set off to beat everyone up. Young stupid parents should watch this before they have children.

The Bride of Frankenstein
(1935) [Trailer]
Director: James Whale [IMDB]

Synopsis: Frankenstein is back... and horny.

This is the follow up to Frankenstein and to my surprise contained very little of the bride. It was also surprising in a few other ways. I found this film to be much more heartfelt and endearing towards the monster. You find yourself siding with him and putting yourself in his shoes. He's lonely and misunderstood... and hated by many. I absolutely loved the direction this film took and it's an extreme stand out for me in the world of horror. Tonally it's dark but humorous at times and I wouldn't say there's anything here that's really scary. It's a rare movie experience for me that hit the nail right on the head.

The Mummy
(1932) [Trailer]
Director: Karl Feund [IMDB]

Synopsis: An ancient Egyptian tomb is raided and when a team of British archaeologists open a coffin they find a mummy who's ready to party.

This film didn't work for me as much as the others. I still enjoyed it, but it's slower and is not scary at all... even in 1930's terms. The mummy gets 3 minutes of screen time and then it's just Boris Karloff in old man make up. For what little time he does spend in the mummy suit, it looks pretty sweet, especially given the age of the film. I just found The Mummy to be uneventful and tiresome after awhile.

The Invisible Man
(1933) [Trailer]
Director: James Whale [IMDB]

Synopsis: A scientist figures out how to turn himself invisible so he can lurk on naked chicks... just kidding, he kills people.

This probably falls into second place for me out of all the films so far. The special effects are insane for a film from 1933 and they still hold up very nicely. I think the Invisible Man is the most ominous of all the villains, Claude Rains' delivery is really superb. Overall The Invisible Man is just an entertaining film and goes to show... just cause it's old, doesn't mean it's boring.

The Phantom of the Opera
(1943) [Trailer]
Director: Arthur Lubin [IMDB]

Synopsis: When an older violinist gets dropped from the Paris Opera, his obsession with a young singer turns crazy when he becomes horribly disfigured and starts haunting the Opera.

This is a classic... it's referenced in tons of pop culture and other films. While I did enjoy The Phantom of the Opera, I wasn't knocked out by it. I'd say the most impressive thing about the movie was the blu-ray transfer, it's perfect and the movie looks as good as any film could look from the 1940's. The score is tremendous and one of the other winning elements of the movie. There is also a few lighthearted moments I wasn't expecting, especially between the two guys competing for the girl's love. All and all it's a good watch, and worth your time. Claude Rains does a bang up job as the Phantom... bravo Claude Rains.

The Wolf Man
(1941) [Trailer]
Director: George Waggner [IMDB]

Synopsis: A man gets bit by a wolf... he then... in turn... becomes a wolf. Like I needed to say that.

This is the second time I've seen this film and I liked it just as much this go around. The film is very dark and brooding, it's totally goth... but way before goth... you know what mean?

The film is a bit more violent than the others, with maybe the exception of The Invisible Man. The make up for the Wolf Man and the set pieces are all top notch for the time.

It was good to see Claude Rains back in action... I like Claude Rains.

Creature from the Black Lagoon
(1954) [Trailer]
Director: Jack Arnold [IMDB]

Synopsis: Scientists unearth a fossil that leads them on an expedition into the amazon where they find a new species of life... a killer fish man.

Creature from the Black Lagoon promotes evolution, which I don't believe in; therefore... it sucked. Actually it was pretty cool. This movie, sadly, does not have Claude Rains in it but it does star Julia Adams... who's much more attractive than Claude Rains, so it's got that going for it. I really loved the monster suit, but what I didn't realized is a lot of this takes place underwater and the creature is even more effective when filmed below the surface. It tends to drag a little toward the end but all and all it was a good film.