The Beastmaster

The Beastmaster
(1982) [Trailer]
Director: Don Coscarelli [IMDB]

Chances are if you grew up in the 80's and had HBO, you probably saw Beastmaster at one point or another. I thought back then that it was one of the scariest films ever made. You got little kids being thrown into fire pits, creepy witch ladies with butter faces, weird bird people who turned you into human soup, and the green earwigs which turned you into a raging S&M monster... to a six year old... that's some terrifying shit. It has been a film I've been waiting to come to blu-ray, but that doesn't look like it's gonna happen anytime soon, so I just watched a shitty downloaded copy because I'm tired of waiting... I'm ready for a little Beastmaster in my life.

Synopsis: Marc Singer (aka Mark Hamill part two) is a warrior who can communicate with animals. When his village is destroyed he seeks to enact revenge on the guilty.

Beastmaster is still pretty fun and it was nice to revisit it after all this time. It's still dark and the effects hold up surprisingly well... what doesn't hold up is the acting. Marc Singer is pretty brutal and Tanya Roberts isn't much better. It's Beastmaster... I'm not really excepting Daniel Day-Lewis quality acting, so I guess I wasn't too bothered by it.

The ending seemed really dragged out. First you have the confrontation with Rip Torn (the evil preist) and then the enemy hord from the beginning return to slug it out. I think they should have just ran with one senario.

If you're into the whole sword & sandals genre and you haven't seen The Beastmaster... you should do so right away. If you're not, you could probably live out the rest of your days and be content without it in your life.

The Sound of Music

The Sound of Music
(1965) [Trailer]
Director: Robert Wise [IMDB]

The Sound of Music is considered a classic and many say it's one of the greatest musicals of all time. While I had vague memories of watching it as a child, I figured I'd buy the newly restored blu-ray and see if it holds up... that and my wife wanted it.

Synopsis: A nun leaves the church and helps raise the family of an Austrian naval captain.

You may remember my review of Les Mis a few months back and think I hate musicals... that is not the case... I just hated that musical. Truth be told, I'm just not really into that genre, but it doesn't mean I'm not willing to give one a chance. The Sound of Music is a decent film and fairly entertaining. The tunes are all pretty memorable, as was evident when my wife sang along to each of them. It's also a nice romance that throws in a little danger in towards the end.

The transfer to blu-ray looks insane. The hills were alive with more than music... they were alive with 1080p.

Spring Breakers

Spring Breakers
(2013) [Trailer]
Director: Harmony Korine [IMDB]

In a Williams Film Review first, I am bringing you not only a review of Harmony Korine's newest film Spring Breakers, but I am also providing you with some original artwork. Yes... that beautiful poster over there on the left was designed by yours truly... me... Curtis Williams.

Synopsis: 4 misguided teens set off to Florida for spring break and get into some shit.

I was highly anticipating the release of Spring Breakers. Harmony Korine's films are highly polarizing... I remember watching Gummo for the first time and thinking it was awful... but I also kind of liked it.

Spring Breakers is a bloated look at the fucked up society we live in. These are strange times and they call for an even stranger movie. I think Harmony likes to push your buttons and with this film he takes it over the top, but in an accessible way... as opposed to Trash Humpers. The characters are empty and shallow... I couldn't relate to anyone, but that worked for me. I think that's part of the message. I mean honestly... to think you're going to go to spring break in Florida and have a life changing experience is a joke in itself. Korine takes something nauseating (spring break in Florida) and plays with it in an artful way which I absolutely enjoyed.

Spring Breakers has a few really surprising moments, some funny, some raunchy.... mostly involving James Franco (who plays a very convincing shitbag.) It revisits some of the themes seen in Kids, but also had a quasi True Romance vibe to it. If you're familier with Harmony Korine's work, you'll probably dig it, but if you're easily offended I'd skip it.... but then... you should get over yourself and live a little... I'm just saying.